One morning, towards the end of the first semester of my senior year of college, I walked from my apartment to the bus stop. Me, my roommate, some of our friends, and fellow students were headed to campus to complete our final exams.
It was wintertime in Central Missouri. The trees were bare. The air was frigid and the ground was blanketed in a fresh coat of snow. I've lived through many winters in several states but I remember this morning because something struck me. With my hands in the pockets of my orange puffer coat, I leaned over to my friend/roommate and whispered: "It's so quiet out here."
Nature was quiet. The volume had been reduced to the lowest possible setting. The wind blew softly. Those naked trees stood staunch. The sound of booted feet landing on the snow produced a muted crunch. Even this group of college students stood surprisingly subdued as we waited for our bus. Nature: mother and human were quiet.
My roommate didn't even speak to respond to my observation. She just nodded.
Last month, over a decade later, I learned something about that morning. According to Uber Facts, "Fresh snowfall acts as a sound absorber, lowering ambient noise by trapping sound waves within the spaces between individual snowflakes. That's why it sounds so quiet when it snows."
I shared the fact on my Instagram story with a realization it's taken me my whole life to properly articulate about this time of year:
Everything is telling us to rest.
Then came an additional confirmation. Nigerian writer, artist and priestess Ehime Ora, wrote this on Threads:
As a descendent of enslaved people from that same West Africa, this resonated with me.
Me and winter have never really gotten along. I hate being cold. And to be honest, dealing with frigid temperatures as a person of African descent reminds me of yet another negative side effect of the Trans Atlantic Slave trade. I wasn't made for this climate and I'm not built for it. But the older I get, the more I realize another vestige of slavery: capitalism, might have also contributed to my failure to adjust to the season and what nature has been trying to say through it.
Last March, I gave birth to my daughter. In addition to the newness of her life and mine as a mother of two, I also noticed that Mother Nature was coming alive as well. Spring was on the way. The earth was thawing and waking up. Of course, I've witnessed the changes in seasons before. But last year was the first year I thought to apply that lesson to my own life. Nature woke up because she had been resting--sleeping. Perhaps we should be doing the same. Instead of trying to hit the ground running or planning and plotting our whole year from the onset, why can't we begin it with rest?
One thing I do love about winter are the holidays. That period between Christmas Eve and New Year's Day when you lose track of time. You don't know what day of the week it is. You spend all of your days eating, watching tv from underneath warm, soft blankets. You have very few plans and are spending your time with people you love and hopefully enjoy. As an adult, this is the magic of the holiday season: the ability to finally slow down and do nothing.
I've never been a new year's resolution girl. Now I know why. January, the middle of winter, never felt like the right time for that. This year, 2025, I've resolved that my New Year will begin in March, when nature's energy is renewed.
So, what does that mean practically? Am I taking a sabbatical? Can't afford it. If I were independently wealthy, I wouldn't work or do shit until March. But I'm a victim and participant in this capitalistic system. So I have to work.
But I'm not taking on any extra responsibilities. I've always been a Bare Minimum Betty in my work for corporations. But now it's even more intentional. Even the work I desire to do for myself, I'm putting on hold. This has been an ongoing journey (read: struggle) for me as I attempt to detach my worth from my productivity. I contemplated whether I should even write this article. But I hope this might be helpful for someone else. So it felt worthwhile to share. And this is work I enjoy, which brings me to my next point.
Do the things you enjoy. Restfulness and quiet doesn't ever have to be boring. In fact, it should be the complete opposite. Take the time to lean into the pleasures that might get neglected throughout the year. Read the books that have been collecting dust. Watch the shows on your watchlist. Call the people you've been meaning to catch up with. I recently remembered how much joy completing a puzzle brought me.
Daydream: Just because I'm not setting resolutions doesn't mean I'm not reflecting on the future. I think there's a difference between action items versus vision boarding which is more like manifesting in my opinion. I'm going to envision the life I want to live. But more importantly, I'm using this time to think about the person I ant to be. How do I want to feel on a day to day basis? How do I want to respond. to stress and the bad behavior of others? Of myself?
Don't make any major decisions. Your boss bitch era will arrive soon enough. In the meantime, rest. You'll find that with all this extra down time you'll be more clear and more sure about what you need to do moving forward.
Keep the party going. I've always enjoyed the pomp and circumstances of the holidays. I have to believe the abrupt end to those celebrations and or return to the world of work just a little too soon contributes to the seasonal depression so many of us experience. I'm staying in the holiday spirit by continuing to listen to my Christmas music. It lifts my spirits and puts me in a space of gratitude and worship. That's right where I need to be all of the time really, but especially during a season when it's easy to be irritated and annoyed.
Reflect. I began this year recovering from a flu and then a nasty stomach virus. My entire family was forced to sit down. I thought about going to Watch Night Service. Nah. Wanted to take my son to a museum he's already visited. Nope. The universe told me to sit my ass down. My sister told her friend--that I count as my own-- about our troubles and she said, "Well, it seems like you needed to purge some things from the old year before you go into the new one. Praise God. 2024 was a wild ride, with a lot of dark energy. We know 2025 will not be without its trials. They've already begun for some of us. But I desperately need a shift in energy. If that is you too, I pray you didn't have to suffer through something as unpleasant as a stomach bug to clear this energy but now is the time to reflect in preparation for what will be.
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